And what to do?

So I had seen my psychiatrist who actually broke up our relationship as she was taking another job in other hospital. She said that Amanda (ex psychotherapist) and her had spoken about me recently , and that they got into conclusion that I actually might have Bipolar.

Well that was a bit of surprise, and yes now I see the light and why they say that. Though she didn't put her diagnosis  she said it is worth to try Lithium or Depakote. She promised to send a letter to my GP and advise him further what to do. So I received my letter without the page where she had said what steps to take and what dosage to prescribe. Well , my GP did not receive this letter and so he couldn't give me any advice on that. Surprisingly when I returned to see him after 2 weeks he had the letter and said that he is not able to carry on or even start me on depakote. Then with lithium I have to be stable on medication so they could carry it over from psychiatrist.


Loads of misinterpretation, not knowing or other shit is going on with thw bloody NHS, Doctors are not capable of doing anything, one is saying one thing and the other is saying other thing, that makes me hate them and what is worse it makes me more and more frustrated. Like now I had 4 weeks off because I have been depressed and how can I get better if I have idiots dealing with my health. GRRRYYY

So any way nothing will happened until 18 November as this is the day I have my appointment with my psychiatrist. We will see what she will say.

Going back to bipolar I realised that I haven't got much of manic episodes. Now when I stayed at home for the first 2.5 week I felt very week and tired and sleepy and then I had like 3 - 4 days doing stuff, smiling ,giggling, waking up at night and play computer games , cleaning  and then I thought I'm cured my depression is gone . And then relapsed again but not as severe as before , now I feel kind of steady but I know that this depression hasn't gone yet.

So what should I do?

I am about to change my surgery as the one I am with now is shitty one with terrible patient service. Well I hope that it will be a good choice, at least I might be able to book an appointment with this same GP!

Well that's it for now XOXO