Do you believe? I do, I do believe in things and that there is something looking over me. I do know that I have my guardian angel - let's say, and that he is watching over me. I know that there is karma - doing good will return you good , doing bad will return you bad. I do believe in God , I'm a Christian and maybe that's why I have faith that there is something which we call god and I pray at times, usually when I want something or when I'm frightened. How bad of me, isn't it? I pray when I need something, but there are some moments that I pray coz I remembered to,or I want to thank for something what had happened, so it's not that bad then. I believe in magic that there is a way of making things happen, like making someone love you - I actually did it. When I was with my, then, boyfriend I read a lot of books about black and white magic, he was really upsetting me with his behavior and I was so in love with him. He would choose his mates over me, go and meet with them but don't come to my place and even didn't bother to call. So I thought I will try to make a spell from the book, and I did, and now he is my husband BUT I didn't think about consequences and I haven't thought through what could happen. He is this same lazy person as he was before, it takes him forever to tidy up and he is the main mess maker together with our boy. I'm the one who does everything- and that's when I get upset.
Everyone is saying that I know everything and I'm so clever, but I want a break sometimes I want someone else to look after me to care for me, to serve me, to deal with everything so I wouldn't have to plan and think of different solutions to the problems. So, yes, I believe in magic, karma and God. I do believe as well that things are happening for a reason and we are the masters of how our life will turn out. Taking into example myself - I screwed up my life, actually people around me did it - mother and father and the rest of close people, raising me that way, that now I don't know who I am, and what I want in life, I haven't got a hobby, and I can not control myself, I will expect me to be the best and I'm not, and they haven't taught me how to cope with that, I will get angry for no reason, I will hate, swear, hit, punch and think, I think a lot. Sometimes I feel like switching off and I can't, and my head is hurting so much from all those thoughts I feel so crazy. I have been an outsider for my whole life, I had been doing things no one else, I knew, did. But I learn how to cope with some of my issues, and there was the time I felt better but now, my old life is back again and it's harder than it was before. But I believe that there are some supernatural things watching over me, They makes me feel safer, more in peace, calm.There I was, on the checkout serving customers, an additional part of my job- at times, and customer approached my till. Hello Hope - she said, hello- I said in reply and smiled. The woman looked worried but smiled back. How are you, I have asked , I had a terrible week, she said. She was with her husband, he as well looked a bit different. I tried to change the subject while serving them, but she was repeating the - bad week. Then she said that on monday her daughter bought a new car - second hand from someone, and the car had blown out. Her daughter is only 23 she was repeating , I got goose bumps allover me, so I asked, is she alright? The lady said - yes, thanks god to the two men who jump out of the car from the opposite side of the highway, jump the barrier in the middle and shouted get off the car, so she did, and then she saw fire at the bottom of the car and a few seconds later the car had blown out. She showed me the picture, there was nothing left from the car just the frame. OMG I thought the girl cheated the death, or it was karma, or the God's doing or just her guardian angel done his work. The women said that her daughter hasn't even had a chance to thank those two people who saved her life, because the moment she was out of the car they turn around and go back to their car and drove off, coz the traffic started to get worst.
Then she said that they went for a dinner during the week to one of their friends and had a lovely time, and at the end of the week on Saturday morning those friends found their 20 years old son dead in bed, he died in his sleep. Such a tragedy.
So I do believe that there is something powerful, isn't there?
I wish we all could master the way of protecting ourselves and the loved ones.
XOXO
