DOG

Went to bed late last night it was 2am, woke up in the morning 8.30 was all ok , now I feel anxious. For some reason I am worried my head feels heavy, I feel disturbed, and think about my past.

For some reason I always had dogs around me even steal a puppy as a child, called him K9 but after few weeks owner find out where his pet was and came over to claim him back with the puppy's mother. Obviously I was sad, I loved this dog, I remember watching the whole situation from the balcony when they were taking him away and thinking that they have more than one dog why they want him back? I had for most of my life one dog, great guard and a friend, through my childhood he was my friend, I cannot recall people around me but I remember all about pets. I had many of different pets around mice, hamsters, parrots, cats, turtle, rats, wild birds, hedgehogs, and obviously dogs. When I was 17 my very best friend give me a dog for my birthday and I could choose him from the puppies her bitch had , and so I did. I choose the gingerly dog of them all, he was so cute, and I didn't care if my mother didn't allow me to have another dog. I bring him home and kept him in my room as he was very small, I make him a bed and give him plush toys to keep him company at night. And so he stayed with me. He was my best friend from the first day - feeling sad when thinking about it now , sigh - I took him everywhere I went, if it was meeting with friends in the pub, or in the park or going to motorcyclist gathering - he was there with me. I take him to my boyfriends house, he was a passenger with me when riding a motorbike with friends. He was my baby, my friend, my lovely little dog who everyone adored - I'm crying I miss him so much. When I was 25 he had gone missing, that’s what happened. I have moved with my boyfriend and dog stayed at my parents house, one day when my brother's friend  comes along, my dog runs away through the gate and have never been seen since then. I cried so much and blame myself for leaving him behind, he was there for me always no matter what and I abandoned him because of my selfishness, I looked for him around the block and beyond, I went to pound so many times to see if someone brings him over, but I never found him again.

This still hurts me so much thinking of him, the thought that he could still be with me if I didn't move from my parents house and leave him behind. From that moment I didn't find any other pet that I would love as much. I have a ferret currently, he is just perfect as I was looking for him over a year, he looks like Siamese cat with dark paws and a tale and sand coloured body. Love him dearly but not as much, still thinking about my pet dog lovely guy who was there for me no matter what, listen to me whenever I need to talk, keep me company in my worst and loved me just the way I was. Miss you little pal ..... I just hope you are happy wherever you are...... Still loves you loads !